Even if you’re deeply involved in a romantic relationship,it’s important to maintain a true platonic friendship with the people you care about. No one wants to be the kind of person who disappears off the face of the planet as soon as they get a new sweetheart!
Whether you’re in a relationship or not, it’s important to maintain quality friendships in your life. Friends can serve as a sounding board and support system throughout your life. And they will often be more consistent than your romantic relationship, until you find THE one, of course. If you’re in a relationship, it’s been proven that maintaining friendships can be beneficial to your relationship. Friendships are an important part of self-care that can bring some balance to your life when you are in a serious romantic relationship. While friendships can be a source of support and joy in your life, not all friendships are good and healthy. Just as you can have an unhealthy romantic relationship, you can have an unhealthy platonic relationship.
Unhealthy friendships are friendships that don’t give you love or support. They are friendships that drain you of energy or leave you feeling insecure or unsure of yourself. These are not the type of friendships you want to maintain or continue, relationship or not. To avoid unhealthy friendships and focus on fulfilling relationships, pay attention to these 15 signs that your friendship is genuine:
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1. They notice the little things
A true friend is someone who notices the little things. Whether it’s a new haircut (which isn’t that small) or a new pair of shoes, you want your best friends to notice and acknowledge when you change things up! It’s more than a casual compliment, it means that they are paying attention to you and that you are seen in the relationship. Noticing small changes (good or bad) shows that your friend cares about you!
2. It shows up when it matters
One of the main differences between a true friend and other friends is how they handle or help you handle life’s difficulties. Real friends are able to show up for you at important, stressful, sad, difficult times when you need them most. How you show up can vary from person to person, especially considering how love languages affect how you show support. It may not be in the way you expect, but it is no less important.
3. They are holding up
True friends are people who are aware of your life. They are people with whom you share news, good or bad, and people who follow up on that news.True friends make time for you in their lives and spend energy keeping up with what is going on in your life. If you tell a true friend about the possibility of a promotion or acceptance, he will contact you to see if it has happened! And he’ll be by your side, no matter what the news is.
4. It is reliable
A true friend is someone you can count on. You know he will keep his commitments to you. You know you can count on him or her to show up for you when you need them. True friends are people who have proven they are willing to show up for you in the past and whowill continue to do so because you are a priority to them.
5. They always support you
Trying new things is hard, especially if you don’t have anyone to encourage you! Real friends arepeople who support you when you try new things, whether you succeed or not. Real friends understand the importance of testing your limits, trying new things, and pushing yourself, which is why they support you no matter what. You want to avoid friendships where people are overly critical or make fun of you for trying new things!
6. They applaud your success
While your friends should support you through the tough times, it’s especially important that they are by your side when you succeed. A true friend will be able to cheer you on from the sidelines and support you in your success. It’s often hard to be your own supporter, especially if you’re not used to bragging or promoting your success to others. That’s where best friends come in! A best friend should not only applaud your success, but they should also brag about you to the world.
7. They don’t feel threatened by your success
While your friend is applauding your success, it’s important that they don’t feel threatened by it. A true friendwill be able to remove the jealousy from the situation and celebrate you for you! If your friend feels threatened by your success, or if you feel like you have to hide your success from them, then they are not a true friend.
8. They are autonomous
While it’s important to be able to rely on your friends (this is a key element of a true friendship), it’s also important that your friends don’t rely on you too much. In other words, it’s important that your friends be self-sufficient. True friends don’t put all their burdens on your shoulders. They understand that you have your own stuff to deal with and respect your boundaries. If you want to be a true friend, you also need to be self-aware and make sure you don’t rely on your friends too much. Not everyone has the same boundaries in this regard, so it’s often helpful to talk about it.
9. They take time for you
You should never have to fight for your friends’ time. Real friends make time for you and prioritize going out with you over other less important things. No one can prioritize you all the time (and shouldn’t have to if you’re on your own), but real friends make an effort to see you and keep you in their lives. This is the case even if they have a significant other in their life. And it’s a standard you should hold yourself to, even if you have a significant other in your life as well.
10. They keep their promises
Promises are important. Whether it’s a commitment to go to lunch this week or a larger promise, true friends understand what promises mean and keep them. We recognize that things are sometimes out of our control and that not every little promise can be kept, but when they are, true friends recognize the weight of a broken promise and work to make up for it.
11. They keep your secrets
True friends are people you can trust with your secrets. You know they won’t share your secrets with anyone, and you don’t have to think twice about gossiping or telling them how you really feel about certain situations or people.
12. They understand you on a deep level
What really distinguishes friends from true friends is whether or not they understand you deeply. When someone understands you on a deep level, you don’t have to explain yourself. They understand how you think and what your priorities are. They know how you react to certain situations and know how to cheer you up when you are in a bad mood. True friends know your flaws and accept you as you are, with all your imperfections.
13. You do not feel embarrassed in their presence.
In the same vein, you should be able to be yourself in the presence of your real friends and not have to fear their judgment. Real friends accept you for who you are, despite your quirks and annoying habits, and don’t make you feel self-conscious about just being yourself.
14. They tell the truth, even if it is difficult.
We’ve all been in situations where it’s much easier to tell a white lie than to tell the truth. And while lying is sometimes easier, especially if it saves someone embarrassment or heartache, it’s important that you surround yourself with true friends who will tell you the truth, even if it’s hard. Real friends understand the value of honesty and will make the (sometimes) difficult decision to be honest so that you know the truth,
15. Being around them makes you feel happy, not down.
As we’ve said before, friendships should be uplifting. They should be a source of joy in your life and give you energy in some way. If your friendships are draining you, or if they are a source of stress in your life, then they are not real.The presence of your friends should make you happy.If this is not the case, you may need to reevaluate your boundaries or seek out friendships with people who possess these 15 characteristics.